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OzanaruSyra Status: Online!  Honored Retirees

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Posted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 12:28 pm Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | The pain and stress causes those of equal or lower rank to go unconscious, two ranks lower and one can die from cardiac arrest. During this time the victim is completely frozen in place and completely unaware of their body outside of the genjutsu, this means that conventional means of freeing one's self from genjutsu will not work and the victim will have to find another way to free themselves, if they can at all. The user of the genjutsu is completely conscious of themselves in and out of the genjutsu which means that they can still move around freely whilst maintaining the jutsu. |
This whole chunk here suggests a higher rank, in comparison to other genjutsu of similar effects.
Others are fine.
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Yasuo Amano Status: Online!  Head of Applications

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Masakado Status: Offline  Forum God

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Posted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 4:30 pm Post subject: |
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| Yasuo Amano wrote: | | Kats... I know exactly why it's a kinjutsu, I was making the point that it does not harm the user. |
Technically, its not kinjutsu. But for the sites rules, it is.
| Masakado wrote: | | Ok, I'll break it to as follows: your genjutsu is not a kinjutsu, please get rid of that portion; a kinjutsu requires some type of damage to you as a user, your genjutsu provides no reason for it to be marked as such; and lastly, the kinjutsu would hurt you almost as much as you hurt your opponent, kinjutsus make you as a fighter weaker, therefore, decreasing your chances of surviving and are very hard to manage, but are very powerful. |
Like I said, excessive chakra drain is a form of damage/hindrance to the user of the jutsu. Your argument still doesn't carry much weight.
It also does not break any natural rules, so you need to remove the Kinjutsu part and increase the rank. :/
_____
| Velidina_Shiatamme wrote: | | Now that I think about it, B (Kin) might be good because it might be harder to learn, needing points instead of posts, and depending on the grader, that can be hard to come by, making the learner make better posts of controlling it to get the points, instead of X number of posts that may be mediocre. |
NO!! Don't try and abuse the kinjutsu system to lower the rank of the jutsu.. >_> _________________
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Yasuo Amano Status: Online!  Head of Applications

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Posted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 9:00 pm Post subject: |
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I think the part that the user has full control in either enviroment; I think s/he should have some limitations on movement. My first idea would be the user could move between the real world and the genjutsu, but only be in one at a time. So while he was in the Genjutsu, his body in the real world would stop moving, and if he was visible in the Genjutsu and had to move back, he'd appear not moving as well. _________________
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OzanaruSyra Status: Online!  Honored Retirees

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Posted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 10:32 pm Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | The pain and stress causes those of equal or lower rank to go unconscious, two ranks lower and one can die from cardiac arrest. During this time the victim is completely frozen in place and completely unaware of their body outside of the genjutsu, this means that conventional means of freeing one's self from genjutsu will not work and the victim will have to find another way to free themselves, if they can at all. The user of the genjutsu is completely conscious of themselves in and out of the genjutsu which means that they can still move around freely whilst maintaining the jutsu. |
Point by point, that way you can just take out a point or two.
1. Automatic unconsciousness.
2. Possible death from cardiac arrest.
3. Unable to free themselves in conventional manner.
4. Low possibility of freeing themselves.
5. Moving freely whilst maintaining jutsu.
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TheGreatWarMage Status: Online!  RPG Moderator

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Posted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 11:37 pm Post subject: |
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I would suggest a distance amount. If you can only move 15 meteres (as example) away from target then that helps keep it B rank.
They can move in the genjutsu, meaning they can dodge the chains, though unlikely can help keep it B rank. Can always create more chains in the genjutsu, though if they dodge it enough they can get out perhaps? Plus makes it more, interesting to RP.
Moving in only one world, though that would destroy the whole point of the jutsu it seems.
Would remove equal rank from unconsciousness, just have it as shocking fear. This would cause a person to be unable to move for...2 posts lets say, maybe more. Depending on the person i guess? Though same effects can be made on higher ranks...just not as long a shock?
Just adding 2 of the above would seem fair for keeping a B rank. _________________
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Yasuo Amano Status: Online!  Head of Applications

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Posted: Wed Oct 28, 2009 9:35 am Post subject: |
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There is also the matter of an auto cast. This doesn't seem to require hand seals nor does it account for the fact genjutsus require focus. This almost feels like you do what ever you do to initiate your genjutsu and then it works. When you write a genjutsu you should account for all your actions. This includes regular ninjutsu and advanced ninjutsu as well.
A genjutsu is keen on application, action, and potential.
The method of your application is non-existent. I suggest that you describe how it is applied, decrease the complexity, and account for potential after-effects.
What do I mean by complexity? Your genjutsu requires more skill than your allotting it. Simply restricting the movements of your opponent via illusion and being able to move while doing so is A-ranked. You not only do that, but your jutsu also causes mental and physical stress to the victims body. That bumps your jutsu up to S-rank easy.
The illusion you have created is also very elaborate, which causes more focus to be put into your genjutsu. To keep that world you have described, I suggest you have to stay in position into the chains are secured around the person. _________________
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Yasuo Amano Status: Online!  Head of Applications

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Posted: Wed Oct 28, 2009 10:12 am Post subject: |
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| Masakado wrote: | There is also the matter of an auto cast. This doesn't seem to require hand seals nor does it account for the fact genjutsus require focus. This almost feels like you do what ever you do to initiate your genjutsu and then it works. When you write a genjutsu you should account for all your actions. This includes regular ninjutsu and advanced ninjutsu as well.
A genjutsu is keen on application, action, and potential.
The method of your application is non-existent. I suggest that you describe how it is applied, decrease the complexity, and account for potential after-effects.
What do I mean by complexity? Your genjutsu requires more skill than your allotting it. Simply restricting the movements of your opponent via illusion and being able to move while doing so is A-ranked. You not only do that, but your jutsu also causes mental and physical stress to the victims body. That bumps your jutsu up to S-rank easy.
The illusion you have created is also very elaborate, which causes more focus to be put into your genjutsu. To keep that world you have described, I suggest you have to stay in position into the chains are secured around the person. |
You're the one overcomplicating things. I understand that you think you're helping but you aren't, so I'll ask you the last time to stop. _________________

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